I’d do it again

Posted by Dawn
June 29, 2007

This week the boys and I have been to two malls and Steinmart as well as the grocery store. Talk about a world of difference from my fear to leave the house alone with them just a month ago.

And I really feel the need to mention that it has happened. This week I spent time looking at the pictures of the boys from birth and the first month in amazement and awe at how much they have grown and changed. And with that comes the inevitable:
“I would have another baby.”

It’s all of a sudden and out of nowhere. Because the first few months were so hard for me. The lack of sleep, the change in hormones, my inexperience with caring for a baby (not to mention TWO), did I mention the lack of sleep? I don’t do well in stress and found my very core challenged as aspects of my personality that I do not like reared their ugly heads as my coping mechanisms. My insecurities were amplified by the lack of sleep and the hormones. There were times when I was not proud of my thoughts or actions towards the boys and myself. I would weekly call up to the heavens “why me??” with tears streaming down my cheeks as both babies cried and I had no idea how to take care of them. But we made it to the other side. As much as 4 months with twins was a big change, 6 months is even bigger. People keep warning me to be prepared for the challenges once they can crawl/walk, etc. And I’m sure they will be big challenges. But I have to just enjoy where we are now. I have never felt so much love and pride then I do with these two little boys. And proud of myself that I did it, made it 6 months with two VERY healthy and adorable boys.

So it’s true what people say about once the insanity of the first few months of a newborn passes, something washes over you helping you forget how “awful” it was and focus only on the beauty of it. Biology sure is good at it’s job, making sure there are more babies!

1st year, Twins

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